The Real Talk on Porn: Dangers, Benefits, and What Men Need to Know
Porn is everywhere. It’s accessible, customizable, and, for many men, a normal part of life. It’s not like when I was a teenager and I had the one hustler under my mattress that I used and abused for 6 months until I got access to another porno mag, LOL. To gain access to a VHS was like hitting the lottery! The Beastie Boys had it right when they complained about their mom throwing away their best porno mag!!!!
Whether it’s an occasional stress reliever or a daily habit, porn still is considered taboo. But let’s get past the shame and judgment and talk honestly about what porn can do for you—and what it can do to you.
The Potential Benefits of Porn
Let’s start with the good stuff. Porn, when used mindfully and in moderation, can have some upsides.
1. A safe outlet for desire
Porn offers a way to explore fantasies and sexuality without risk of pregnancy, STIs, or emotional entanglements.
2. Helps partners communicate
For some couples, watching porn together can spark conversations about desires, kinks, and boundaries—, this convo needs to be handled delicately and don’t forget your lady gets to tell you what her desires are, tread lightly!
3. Can support sexual function
For men experiencing low desire or erectile difficulties due to anxiety or stress, porn may help them reconnect with arousal—temporarily. Orgasism are good for you, don’t believe me check this out: https://www.mensjournal.com/health-fitness/9-ways-orgasms-may-benefit-your-health-20140414#gid=ci02b8d081e00a2605&pid=fertility
4. Normalizes sexual diversity
Ethically made, inclusive porn can show a wider range of bodies, preferences, and sexual expressions than mainstream media usually offers. Hey you might find out you like something you didn’ t know you liked!
The Dangers of Porn
But let’s be real—porn is not all upside. Overuse, compulsive viewing, or the type of porn consumed can create serious issues. If you are in a relationship, your intimacy could decrease and you may start to ignore your partner.
1. Unrealistic expectations
Porn doesn’t reflect real sex. It’s scripted and to some degree unrealistic. Constant exposure can distort how men view women, sex, and themselves. I’ve told teens that I’ve worked with, porn teaches expectations and norms that may or may not be acceptable in their sexual relationships.
2. Desensitization
Over time, frequent porn use can lead to needing more intense or extreme content to feel aroused, potentially impacting real-life sexual performance. Think about it like drugs and alcohol, the more you can handle, the more you need to get you right!
4. Addiction-like behavior
While not officially classified as an addiction, porn can become compulsive. If it’s interfering with work, relationships, or mental health, it may be time to talk with a professional about how it’s causing issues for you.
Ask Yourself:
Am I watching out of boredom, loneliness, or stress?
Is porn enhancing or replacing my real-life intimacy?
Do I feel shame or guilt after watching?
Can I go without it for a few days or weeks?
Bottom Line
Porn isn’t inherently good or bad—it’s a tool. But like any tool, it can be used wisely or destructively. What matters is how you’re using it, why, and whether it’s helping or hurting your well-being. You can find some pretty “interesting” things on a porn site and I’m pretty sure its a lot more I don’t know about. Also, this is super important, if you are watching porn that doesn’t promote consensual sex or watching pro where someone is being abused or taken advantage of that can become problematic.
If porn is creating tension in your relationship, lowering your confidence, or leaving you feeling isolated, talk to a therapist or sex coach. There’s no shame in wanting a better relationship with your sexuality.
Mindful porn use is possible—but so is life without it. Choose what supports your growth, not just what feels good in the moment. Peace!
